18/10/2026
🚨🚨 WARNING TO ALL HOMEOWNERS, LANDLORDS & ESTATE AGENTS ACROSS ESSEX, HERTFORDSHIRE & LONDON!! 🚨🚨
THERE’S A MAN GOING AROUND FIXING PEOPLE’S HOUSES WITHOUT ANY CONSIDERATION FOR THE PROBLEMS THEY’VE GROWN ATTACHED TO!! 😡🔨
PLEASE SHARE BEFORE SOMEONE ELSE FALLS VICTIM!! 😤
Reports are coming in of a bloke operating under the name SWIFTFIX.
Usually spotted carrying a toolbox, wearing work clothes and looking like he knows what he’s doing.
At first, he seems friendly enough.
Turns up on time. Has a little chat. Might even make you a cup of tea.
BUT DON’T BE FOOLED!! 😱
Because once this man gets his tools out…
ABSOLUTE CHAOS FOLLOWS!! 🤯
🚪 A DOOR THAT’S BEEN STICKING FOR FIVE YEARS?
Gone. Opens and closes like it’s brand new. The family are devastated.
🚽 A TOILET SEAT THAT’S BEEN SLIDING SIDEWAYS SINCE LOCKDOWN?
Fixed. Now everyone has to sit down properly.
🔧 A DOOR HANDLE THAT NEEDED A SPECIAL LITTLE WIGGLE TO OPEN?
Repaired. Years of muscle memory completely wasted.
🎨 A WALL WITH A HOLE HIDDEN BEHIND A PICTURE?
Filled, sanded and painted. The picture is now unemployed.
🚿 SILICONE THAT’S BEEN BLACK SINCE THE LAST WORLD CUP?
Removed. Replaced. The mould has been made homeless.
💡 A LIGHT SWITCH THAT ONLY WORKED IF YOU HIT IT TWICE?
Sorted. The household’s daily routine ruined.
🪛 A KITCHEN CUPBOARD THAT ONLY CLOSED IF YOU LIFTED IT FIRST?
Adjusted. Now closes with one finger. Absolutely disgraceful.
AND IT GETS WORSE… 😡
Apparently, this bloke has now started working at Jimmy Bullard’s pub, The One Bell! ⚽🍺
Even former professional footballers aren’t safe from his behaviour.
Sources say Jimmy’s pub is slowly being robbed of all its little maintenance problems.
WHEN WILL THIS MADNESS END?! 😂
And here’s the really worrying part…
He’s actively encouraging people to send him photos of things that need fixing.
FOUR PHOTOS!!
That’s apparently all it takes for him to start giving you a quote.
Before you know it, that job you’ve been putting off for three years could actually be DONE! 😱
So please, I’m begging you…
DO NOT CONTACT THIS MAN IF YOU ENJOY LIVING WITH BROKEN THINGS!!
However, if you’ve finally had enough of that wonky door, leaking tap, loose handle or unfinished decorating…
You have been warned. 👀
🔨 SWIFTFIX — HANDYMAN & PROPERTY MAINTENANCE
📍 Harlow | Essex | Hertfordshire | London
🌐 www.swiftfixhq.com
PLEASE SHARE. YOUR WONKY DOOR COULD BE NEXT. 🚪😂
Any issue big or small please reach out for a quote
